A funny conversation with a true follower

Atheists: violent and bloodthirsty without Biblical reason.I am an atheist and I have a moral code based on human pain and suffering and empathy for others, especially those close to me. I also have a healthy fear of incarceration. Besides that I don't really feel it takes much to be moral. I was sitting at work one day eating lunch in a tiny little lunch room on my tiny 30-minute break when I got into a spiritual debate with a fellow human and a follower of the good Lord.

He told me that without the Lord I could have no morality. As his 'evidence' he proposed the absolutely ludicrous idea that I should be in the streets, at that very moment, murdering and raping people. This was a serious accusation from a man who is college educated, works 9-5 every day as a graphic designer. Because I don't believe in one version of mythology I should be in the streets murdering and raping. Really? That's your argument? While I choke down a dry PB & J in a crappy lunch room on a crappy break from my crappy job, you tell me I should be a criminal of the worst order because I am an atheist? A few facts about me:

1. I have no inner desire to kill or rape.

2. I value human life intensely. As an atheist I do not believe in an afterlife and feel this life is all we get. Therefore, I do all I can to make it pleasant, colorful and interesting, even for others.

3. To kill or rape causes tremendous pain to others and does not serve me in anyway at this point.

4. Humans inflict justice by trial and imprisonment, which is also a good reason for me to keep living my atheist life OUTSIDE jail walls. It would be a shame to spend any of my precious time in existence in a cell.

5. If all Christians have over atheists is that Jesus told them to be nice to each other, I am unimpressed. Be nice? Done. Been doing it for years.

6. I have no criminal record.

All in all, atheists tend to be better educated and less criminal, as indicated by the direct correlation of low-crime nations and high-atheistic nations being often similar. Atheists never pretend to heal or speak to the Lord, take money from the elderly and infirm, mislead our kids about the consequences of sex or walk into crowded public places with bombs strapped to our midsections. For the most part we try and deal with the nonsensical landmines placed all around by the religious (gay marriage, war, ignorance of STDs, televangelists, terrorists, door knockers). So the next time I get told I'm amoral, I might just kill and rape someone in the name of God.

"What is hateful to you, do not do to your neighbor. All else is commentary." - Jewish Sage Hillel.